Christmas traditions
Christmas has come and gone again this year. I love the whole shebang. The traditions, the family stuff, the food. Coming together with family, playing boardgames and eating at big tables.
Every year my siblings and I cook an elaborate dinner for my mom and grandparents. As we get older, we try to make this fancier. That night we also exchange presents with each other. That's getting bigger and bigger every year too. More and more money to spend on everyone. More and more pressure that comes along with it.
At midnight on the 24th we go to a church square behind our house to sing Christmas carols, guided by a small orchestra. Here we meet up with more family. It’s so incredibly sweet and precious. All of us singing out of tune and too loud.
We’re not religious. No one knows the words or the rhythms of these old church songs. It’s the majority of the fun to find the right words in the little paper books and keep up.
Christmas day we spend at my grandparents’ house. We do board games and hope it doesn’t get too competitive. This time we did Hitster Bingo and it was hilarious. At least four different generations trying to guess what year songs are from to win. Of course we also eat dinner together. Sometimes accompanied by a heated discussion between the members of the different generations. This year all stayed civil.
I played some piano with my uncle. We’re both not very good at it, but it’s nice to try.
I love these days. Our Christmas isn’t big or grand, but it’s very cosy. I love the elaborate dinners and fancy tablesetting. I love to see my family all nice and dressed up.
But the past couple years, - ever since I started properly adulting - this time has been quite stressful.
When boxing day rolls around, in the Netherlands named ‘2nd Christmas Day’, I feel lost. Deflated. All social obligations are done and finished and it leaves a kind of hole.
I’ve spent weeks searching high and low for the perfect gifts for everyone. In one night they are all given and opened. Receivers were surprised, happy or not very impressed. Sometimes I find good gifts, sometimes just mid ones.
Everyone in the Netherlands is off on the 25th and 26th of December. But I never have any plans apart from with my family. Not my own, at least.
All my holiday plans are decided by someone else. I love doing them, don’t get me wrong. But I want some traditions that are mine as well. Something that I can look forward to that doesn’t involve any stress or pressure. Something that I can do in the quiet moments between social events.
I don’t have any winter solstice, Yule or Christmas traditions that I can fall back on. That I do for me and me alone. To symbolize the ending of the year and celebrate the darker days.
So I decided to come up with some ideas for next year. I probably won’t do all of them, but it’s something to fall back on. To keep the restlessness at bay during the holidays.
Make a Yule altar. With a pine branch or something? Something winter-y that’s not overly Christmas.
Sit more in silence, outside or in front of a window. Maybe meditate on frequencies?
Be outside with sunup and down. Not everyday of course, that sounds pretty intense. But sometimes.
Make a new vision board. Focus on feelings and vibes, not goals. I’ve done this for the past 6 years now. I do one every year where I print out pictures and art that evoke feelings that feel aligned with me. Not goals or numbers, but abstract aspirations.
Make a calendar for 2026, only using photos from the past year. I’ve done this for the past two years and it’s so much fun! Even if I don’t use them very much throughout the year, it’s like a little photo album of me, my partner and his daughter.
Do some spell chanting. Repetitive mantras or affirmations sound cool. In front of a fire or candle to make it extra magical.
Listen to and read stories. Books, folklore and pagan lore. Stories are so cool. By far the coolest and most powerful thing about humanity. I love old folk stories and fairy tales. Winter sounds like the perfect time for that.
Wreaths, mistletoe, red berries, holly and ivy. Everything evergreen. I’d love to have more decorations that have the Christmas colours of red and green, but also feel very earthy.
Make a candle plate. Even though our celebrations are over by Jan 1st, the winter has just begun. Something like a candle plate looks pretty rad and is sure to bring light in the darker days.
Sun-shaped ornaments are part of Yule- and winter solstice traditions. I think it’s a nice symbolism for the darkest days. I’d like to pair them with moon-shaped ones too.
And some movement! I love long walks through the forest and, of course, ice skating.
Maybe put on a wassail bowl? Make mulled wine or a wassail drink. At the very least to get an amazing winter smell in the house.
Something like that sounds fun. I think this is a good list. Between all the family activities, big groups and catching up. It’s fun, it’s loud. The quiet comes crashing in when it’s over all of a sudden. I hope to not feel so lost in the in-between moments in the limbo between Christmas and new years.
